seriously stressed

Grrr, so the other day i found a lump!
i have no idea what it could be, im clean i do a bit of exercise im not very healthy though, im freaking out atm im propper worried ! my health is not the best as it is with my Henoch Shronlein Purpura So im booked in at the hospital for friday to see what this is as i never get spots, lumps or bumps Ever!!!
so this is out of the ordinary, ive been gradually loosing my hair these past couple of weeks and i have put that down to stress, as my previous relationship was extremely depressing and my job is becoming harder and harder! And thats really stressing me out.
other than that i am happy john has been my life saver he is so kind to me he generally cares and is a big part of my life already! I feel i can tell him anything, i went a bit crazy yesterday i got really emotional turned my fone off n just stayed cooped up in bed and just bored the life out of my self and john was there making sure i was ok :) xxxx.
i need to no whats going on with my body though as i will worry myself ! x

Hectic

So then yesterday i had a meeting with my boss, he is a cruel nasty peice of work ! he had a right go at me calling me a compulsive liar saying i drink to much saying that im stupid and failing propper digging deep i nearly punched him!
i drink now and a gain and as for the lieing but hes just full of shit i may be stupid and failing but its there fault for not teaching me there just using me to do all the shite work for cheap!!! i would of left by now if i didnt want to do it! ive put up wiv them trying to propper hurt my feelings, nocking me down n not helping there saying there gunna sack me but if they go down that road ill go through court! as i no my rights im so fed up and stressed dont go on an apprenticeship at ford lol, ive never nown such a nasty company that cuts so many corners!!!!! grrr

anyway onto me and john things are going fantastic we was building his vivarium background last weekend, but were gonna do it the weekend coming. were going to paint it and glue it and i canttttt waittt yayyy im falling in love with johnhes just perfect ! all ive ever wanted :)

vivarium building

So me and john decided to start making the background for his lizard with polystyrene and grout and glue we measured every thing up and made sure it all fit snug in the viv.
we started to make sum rocks also and carve them litterally like rocks and it turned out great!!! i cant wait till next week end because we will be painting and sticking it together along with the plants so wayhayyy!!!! haha. it was soo much fun we made such a mess haha

Mash up weekend

Sooo this weekend has been amazing Me and john went to a PUB with the whole family for a karaoke night, so there was me mom dad my nan and grandad and john and i must admit it was an amazing night out ! We went so that my dad roger could go on the karaoke as he is a professional singer except i sumhow got dragged up and got the worst stage fright ever i made my self look like an absolute prat doing it i was just getting stage fright really bad i was just staring at the screen with the song words on just looking like dooh !!! it was embarrasing i just forgot to sing for ages i had all these people watching me looking at me and laughing so i fort do you no what im just gonna go for it and i sang with all my heart and i really ended up enjoying it i got a few claps so i was happy. i had to leave after the karaoke as me and john was going to a party at his friends house and that wass amazing tooo we was all laughing and having a fab time and getting drunk, we left at four in the morning and i cant even remember walking home, it was just one of them really good nights out and it was nice because his house is really warm and inviting so yeah i met some new people which was really fun and me and john had such a laugh and bonded more. over to saturday sooo we woke up feeling awfullll !!! i mean we was like whats going on still mashed from the night before lol, so we got up and went to the pet shop to get johns lizard some hoppers and mario worms, so we took a detore to mcdonalds ahahha and we had sooo much to eat like 3 double cheese burgers fries everrrythinggg lol, wwe was stuffed after ahahah, we watched a film called friday and just couldnt stop laughing at it lol. but the weekend over all was brilliant

My life is going great

At the moment i feel happier than ive ever felt, and its all because of john no one has made me feel so good about myself ive been hanging out with my friends alot more and having laughs and that.
i had a sleepover last week and sat up all night watching funny videos the one thing i wanna do in life is be laughing as long as im laughing im all good.
im going out tonight with all the family and john were going to watch my moms boyfriend sing and i really cant wait. hes amazing!!!! he does weddings and giggs he has such a powerful voice so im excited to show him off to john lol i might even get up ma self aslong as iv had a few drinks hahha cus i never ever ever sing in public lol. x but yeah cannot wait :)

Johns Parents Are lovely <3

I went to johns house last night and it was amazing again i met his sister his sisters boyfriend and her daughter, they all seem so down to earth and on my level :)

johns mom and step dad sat there for the majority of there night helping me go through my work contract as im rubbish with it all, and they sat there for ages checking everything they checked my wages as well, they was so kind to me and generally care which i think is lovely as they are my boyfriends parents.

John got a pig cake and a balloon hahaha, which made me chuckle its his birthday tomorrow and i think im more excited than he is :)

im sooo happpppy were going to a wedding in two weeks also which will be nice,
my job is crap but atleast i met john <3

Dreading it Nooooo

So i arrived to work this fine monday morning to find every one laughing about me and about what happened saturday night! but there all just bantering and not being mean about it atleast lol.
they have footage and everything so i do feel extremely embarrased. ive been asked to clean all day when i ent no cleaner and dont want to become one my job n bosses are taking the p*** !!! but hopefully being an apprentice it will get easier!
atleast i have got john <3 who i am sooo into i cant believe how im feeling abour him his funny cute clever and just sexy and caring i just hope it all lasts :) xxx